Nothing But Angels

​​
​even the birds get it
silence is everywhere 
without the quiet sea
there would be no waves
no storm and no fish 
how beautiful dependence can be 
and we all grow out of silence 
silent rivers silent trees
silent movement silent
being
between and beyond
for every moment i am born again 
silently agreeing
silently growing 
silently 
knowing
everything
and everywhere 
is silence
- Åsmund Seip

I woke up to December 1st. Everything a hush in the air out side of my friend’s apartment. I've been in Switzerland for the past days acquainting myself again with normal bed times and waking up slowly. Even with all the rest I can’t help but wonder where all of our chaos is leading us. This question is where I am sourcing my energy from these days, and it makes me get up and out of bed. I make coffee and write letters to all of my loved ones that I have overlooked in these last frenzied months of non stop movement. My little sister sends me a picture of her newly shaved head, I gasp over her beauty. Every day it seems someone is sharing a new type of courage with me. I spend whole afternoons by myself while my friend is at work. I can't place a memory to the last time that I have kept my own company, and sometimes the most delicious thing I can do is stare out the window at these trees. It is covered fully in frost today for the first time since I've arrived. Another layer of stillness. I read the words of Åsmund Seip, a modern Norwegian man who gives a gentle voice to our inner conflicts and desires. Sometimes its a poem, sometimes a paragraph, always though he brings my mind back down again into the cracks of my own heart. "I have sent you nothing but angels" he says, and I believe him.